


After Titanic

by girlfromthenorth



Category: Emmerdale
Genre: Attraction, Bigotry & Prejudice, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Falling In Love, From Sex to Love, Infidelity, M/M, Sexual Content, Survival
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-06-05
Updated: 2017-10-22
Packaged: 2018-11-09 09:05:22
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 5
Words: 9,067
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11101332
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/girlfromthenorth/pseuds/girlfromthenorth
Summary: This story begins where most stories of the ill fated Titanic ends. In April 2012 Aaron has left his family and past behind him for a new beginning in America with Ed. But things are about to change...





	1. Wrecking

He’s absolutely petrified when Ed drags him by the collar, through the fighting and screaming passengers, up to the stern of the enormous ship and he hardly understands what’s going on, when Ed looks him straight in the eyes and says “I will always love you” before he brutally pushes him into the sea.

“NO” Aaron flies over the railing. His arms propel in panic before he catches a glimpse of a diving Ed just above him. For a few long moments he feels like he’s actually flying. Then his back hits the surface of the freezing cold Atlantic Ocean. The impact knocks the breath out of him and the downward surge from the sinking ship drags him under. It’s pure survival instinct that makes him fight it. He holds his breath and starts swimming upwards, eyes open, against the pull of the icy water. It’s exhausting and only gets worse, when he’s hit by something on his forehead. For a second he gulps salty water and loses all sense of direction, but then despite the stream of blood from his head, he starts swimming again.

When he finally surfaces on the verge of blacking out, it’s to chaos; iced wawes, shouting, screaming, a deafening metalic noise and turmoil. His lungs feel like exploding and he’s gasping for air. He’s not wearing a life west and his clothes are dragging him down, but he manages to pull off his winter jacket and move away from the relentless surge of the sinking ship while desperately looking for Ed. Where the fuck is he? He’s the one who persuaded him to this adventure. “A new life – together” he had whispered, biting Aaron’s earlobe and Aaron had moodily agreed, despite not really knowing Ed and fearing he would miss home like mad. 

After a few minutes of struggling to swim in the cold Sea, he grabs on to a floating deck chair and realizes that it’s not just deck chairs, but people around him. He does want to help the women and children, but he’s no great swimmer and all he can do is try to keep himself afloat. All of a sudden it goes eerily silent. The Titanic. It's gone. He can hear the rattling of his teeth and his hands are turning blue. He knows his freezing and he can taste blood on his lips, but he doesn’t really feel anything. Not anymore. Suddenly he’s overcome by an immense feeling of sadness. The realization startles him. He doesn’t want to die. Not now. He’s finally free of the charges for buggery on his way to a new life. He has to do something. So he starts shouting. This can't be happening!

And then somehow by magic, he hears the sound of oars in the water, and from the darkness a lifeboat slowly emerges and there's shouting and someone grabs his frozen arm and drags him on board. It hurts. His whole body hurts.

“Come on”

It’s someone familiar in an officer’s uniform with blond hair, Aaron senses, before he collapses over the railing of the life boat and starts vomiting. He's held tightly while emptying the contents of his stomach. 

“Please miss. Can you give us a hand?"

The officer's voice is commanding as he places Aaron on the floor of the boat besides a crying girl. She slowly wraps something around Aarons head and he's suddenly struck by an immense feeling of exhaustion and leans inappropriately close to her. She smells of fear, he registers vaguely. 

From time to time during the next couple of hours, he’s momentarily aware of being surrounded by weeping women and children, but he has no real sense of time. He’s just so fucking cold and a terrible headache is killing him. At some point blood start seeping down his face unto his hands, and the girl moves him gently, so he’s lying with his head in her lap. 

In the early hours of the next morning there’s a sudden turmoil in the boat; cheers, shouting and moving. And after a while he is forced and pushed up a rope ladder and onboard another ship. The daylight is blinding him and he has double vision. His head's pounding from the effort of climbing and then finally everything goes black and he loses consciousness.

When he wakes up, he’s in a tiny cabin on a mattress on the floor under a woolen blanket. Above him is the blond officer and a man in a captain’s uniform. They are both looking down on him and what must be the ships doctor, who’s squatting in front of him, examining his head. It hurts like hell.

"Oh hello there" the doctor says. 

“Your name?” the captain asks in a comanding tone.

“Dingle sir, Aaron Dingle” he whispers with a hoarse voice. He feels terrible. 

"Third class, I presume"

“A fraction to the head, concussion and hypothermia” The doctor concludes. “I’ve done my best to patch it up. You are a very lucky young man, you know”

The doctor administers some white powder in a cup.

“How long were you in the water?”

Aaron shakes his head but immediately regrets it as the cabin starts swirling. 

“We picked him up 30 minutes after she went down”

It’s the officer speaking. He sounds posh all of a sudden.

“30 minutes. Well he deserves to be alive then! Drink this young man”

The doctor shakes his head in disbelief before he gets up with some difficulty.

"Now where's the next?"

The doctor and the captain leave and Aaron is alone in the cabin with the officer. He doesn’t feel like drinking anything, but he does. Slowly. 

“We have to share this cabin I’m afraid”

The posh officer has to bow his head not to hit the ceiling.

“Where?" Aaron asks. He's confused. 

“We are onboard the Carpathia. A passengers ship. You've been unconscious most of the day”

“What? but…” Aaron can hear the fear in his voice. "You haven't seen me mate...Ed...have you?...like...he's a rugby player...like proper good?"

“No I'm afraid not”

Aaron can feel himself going pale as he thinks of Ed. He tries to sit up and the blanket falls down into his crouch. The officer quickly looks away. Aaron wonders who pulled him out of his clothes. And then suddenly he remembers seeing the officer before. Two days ago. Ed and him were fooling around on the third class deck. They were laughing and joking. Ed grabbed his hand and held it a second too long. Aaron froze and couldn't help looking cautiously around and that's when he saw him. On the second class deck. Following them intensely. Oh no. He's suddenly overcome with nausea and quickly lies down again. Where's Ed?

For what feels like hours he tries to sleep in the dark cabin, but it's not happening. He’s either too cold or too hot and when he finally doses off, he’s haunted by terrible nightmares of screaming and drowning people and the image of Ed diving into the Sea mixed with a strong fear of being exposed. They go on and on, to the point where he wakes himself shouting in the middle of the night. He sits straight up, forgetting that he’s starknaked or that his head is still hurting. 

“Nightmare?” the officer whispers through the dark.

His voice is slurred and there's a smell of alcohol. Aaron doesn’t answer, but moments later his mattress gives way and the officer is sat down besides him. He's not posh at all, but puts an arm around Aarons shoulder. It's comforting, but also strangely intimate and much to his dismay a strong hint of attraction runs through Aaron's battered body. No!

“I think you could do with some more medication"

The officer lets go of Aarons shoulder to mix the medication in a cup. Up close he's surprisingly easy on the eye, Aaron thinks before he grabs the cup. For fuck sake! He must be going mad. The bitter taste of the medication makes him cough. The officer doesn't seem to notice though. He just starts talking. 

“They keep flashing through my mind too, you know. Over and over. The last 24 hours. We were one of the first lifeboats to go into the water and we found it hard to find passengers who wanted to come. Can you believe it? So we just rowed away half full. And then when we came back she had gone down, everybody was gone. I really should have done more, but I didn’t realize what happened? And now…the number of survivors is…the only one we saved were you and...”

His voice breaks and he takes a swig of a flask and then another. Clearly trying to drink himself into oblivion. For some reason it mirrors Aaron's emotional turmoil. So when the officer turns and very carefully touches his battered forehead with his hand and then kind of absentmindedly kisses it, Aaron doesn't push him away and when he, realizing what he's just done, looks scared and clumsily tries to get up, Aaron stops him and pulls him into a kiss. On the mouth. The second he's done it, he regrets it. But the officer doesn't turn away. He opens his mouth and kisses him back, desperately and full on, and before Aaron knows, he hastily helps the officer out of his underwear and slides his hands over his naked body and soon everything is an uncoordinated mess of lips, tongues, stubble, hipbones and buttocks, cocks and balls. Sweat mixes with saliva and precum and he’s sure as hell not thinking of Ed or jail for that matter. He should be, but he’s not. Instead his body is on fire and more than willingly turns onto the stomach and lets the officer penetrate it and fuck all the horrible images out of his mind. It's rushed. His body is aching, his head is in pain but the hurt quickly mixes with intense pleasure, the rapid beat of his heart and the blood rushing through his veins. God does it feel good. 

Afterwards, right away, he feels ashamed as he's trying to catch his breath while the aftershocks of the orgasm ripples through his body.

"Shit" is all the officer whispers before he throws a possesive leg across Aarons arse and drags him close. Minutes later deep breaths reveals he's finally asleep. 

For a long time Aaron's staring at the ceiling, completely drained. He can't muster the energy to move away from the officer even though he should. What just happened? He feels like the encounter was almost a really intense wet dream. Something removed from reality. A celebration of survival under extreme circumstances. Yes, that's it. That's all is was. And Ed must never know! Never!


	2. Sinking

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Second chapter, still Aaron's point of view.

Aaron wakes up with a gasp from a deep dreamless sleep with a splitting headache. His body feels like it’s gone 12 rounds against the heavy weight champion of the world. The cabin’s stuffed and he needs to take a piss. He manages to put the remains of his shirt and trousers on. They are stiff of blood, vomit and salt water and bring unwanted memories he immediately tries to escape, stumbling barefooted down the narrow corridor to find a small toilet. After pissing, he catches a glimpse of himself in the mirror above the sink and suddenly a flash of naked bodies and intense pleasure runs through his mind. Fuck. No. He didn’t. How could he?

On his way back he gets lost in the labyrinth of narrow ship corridors and without really knowing how, he ends up on the panorama deck of the ship, walking straight into a bright sunny day. There’s a brisk cold salty breeze that gives him goosebumps and noisy seagulls diving around the stern. The deck is full of people and he’s all of a sudden very conscious of how inappropriately dressed he is, but strangely nobody seems to notice. Despite the upbeat sunny day, an intense feeling of devastation hangs heavy in the air. Then the ship hits a wayward wave and suddenly crippling memories overflows his mind.

“Helloooo”

Out of the blue, somebody in a flowery dress comes running towards him with a shrill that breaks him away from the horrible memories.  

“Please, please! You have to help me find me mum”

It’s the girl from the lifeboat. A cheeky looking teenager with a round face. 

“I really need your help. The others from our boat, they are a bunch of useless cows”

She grabs hold of his shirt.

“Some posh cow  even said that more than 1500 people are unaccounted for and I'm thinking of me mum all the time. We got separated when she wanted to go back for our savings. She threw me in the lifeboat and nobody has seen her since. Her name is Sandra Flaherty, well Sandrine really and I’m Liv, Olivia. What’s your name?”

“Aaron” he mumbles. “1500?” 

She doesn’t answer his question, but takes hold of his hand.

“Who are you looking for? Come on. We can look together”

For the next hour she drags him around the deck squeezing his hand tightly while speaking to group after group of pale and bleary eyed survivors. He's not to much use either at first. He just follows her in a daze until she drags a description of Ed out of him, but then after a while, it's surprisingly good to be doing something. It doesn’t take long though before Liv's positive attitude turns into frustration. None of the people have seen or heard of Ed or Sandra. 

"We need to find the other third class people" She despairs "Maybe they’re on another ship? Can't you ask the captain?”

"Me?"

"Yes you! You'r the adult"

He hesitates. He's no good at speaking to the high and mighty, but then tears start rolling down the girl's cheeks and before he knows, she's a sobbing mess. Oh God. Aaron has no experience with young girl's emotions. Ed would know what to do, but not him. Suddenly reality sinks in and he realizes that sooner or later, he might have to face the fact that Ed's gone! Then out of the blue, seconds before he starts crying too, a finely dressed woman taps him on the shoulder and gives him a bunch of clean clothes and he's standing there like a beggar overcome with loss and shame.

“Here you are”

Just as things couldn’t get much worse, a posh voice breaks through the air. He turns round. Standing before him is a now very familiar figure: all blond hair wawing in the wind. For a second he feels a flutter in his stomach, but then the officer starts talking and a bad day, turns worse.

“Look this might not be the right moment, but there’s something that needs to be completely clear”

In a flash Aaron remembers the possessive leg as the officer goes on. 

“What happened last night…I am married, you see…and…I mean…get me right...I don't regret anything...but alcohol was involved...and the circumstances..." He shakes his head in disbelief "But it’s not something I’ve ever done before…or would ever do again...and in my position…I would be prepared to pay for your discretion…"

“What?”

Aaron doesn't believe his own ears. 

“What do you think I am?”

Suddenly his body is a mass of agressivness. He takes a step forward right up into the officer's face. This is exactly the double standards, that Ed and him were trying to escape and only the fact that the crying girl stands next to them, stops him from punching him.

“Right! Well fine then” the officer lifts both hands in mock surrender, turns around and leaves.

Aaron watches him angrily, as he walks away. He stoops like a lot of tall men, but there’s also a very attractive confidence about him, that comes with class and good fortune. Oh God what is he thinking? Suddenly he feels the headache coming back with a vengeance, followed by an intense feeling of self loathe and he abruptly starts walking back. He needs to get out of this place. He needs to find Ed and just beg he never finds out. Liv catches up with him half way to the cabin with a worried glance. She's stopped sobbing and is all of a sudden back to her feisty self.

“Don’t let all them posh folks bother you. Your better than them”

She follows him back, sticking a supportive arm under his elbow. He tries to push her away, but she holds on and he gives up. He'e too exhausted and by the time they reach the cabin and he lies down, he falls asleep.

She’s still there though, when he wakes up. She’s even conjured a pot of tea and some sandwiches. So instead of being a prick, he does the grown up thing and cleans himself in the washbasin in the toilet and puts on some of the fresh clothes and then he promises to talk to the captain tomorrow. He is after all the adult. She's ever so grateful and gives him a hug. He hasn’t eaten for almost two days and he ends up wolfing down all her sandwiches, while she talks about her mum and their escape to America from her abusive father. It's a bit of a tall tale, but at least she doesn’t cry this time and all the talk stops him from thinking of Ed. After a while she even moves close to him and suddenly he finds himself being hugged again. 

“What is that girl doing here?” Oll of a sudden the officer appears in the cabin. “This is highly inappropriate, you know. A young woman alone in a cabin with two men. She must leave at once”

Tall and domineering, he looks angrily at the two of them. Aaron can't believe he's for real. He feels his temper rising. What a bloody hypocrite. He's just about had it with this arsehole. 

“It’s ok Aaron” Liv rolls her eyes at him “I’ll see you tomorrow”

She leaves and Aaron turns and looks straight at the officer.

“You can’t lord over me or that poor girl, you know. She’s lost her mum so excuse me for not giving a shit about what's appropiate...I mean...as if you had never...” 

There’s a sudden flash of anger in the officer’s green eyes and before Aaron can say more, he's grabbed by the collar and his back hits the wall. For what feels like an eternity he's waiting for the blow of a hard fist, but then unexpectedly he's kissed instead. It’s a rough kiss, teeth and stubble, and Aaron can feel the officer's rockhard cock through fabric pressed against his own. For a moment he feels victorious as the officer kisses him. He knew it. No way is this man new to this game! And now he's going to make the arsehole beg. So he kneels down, opens the tight uniform trousers and swallows the officer’s cock and with all the skills he’s picked up, he sucks him off, licking his shaft while grabbing his balls and then when he can hear him gasp, he stops for a second until, he hears him whimper. By then he has proven his point and he should stop, but he doesn't. The officer's loud noices. They are intoxicating and spur him on, until he feels a load of semen hit the back of his mouth. He swallows and is immediately pulled up by the officer and held in a tight sweaty embrace. “Your so fucking hot” He whispers breathlessly before he kisses Aaron again and again, tasting his own come. Aaron's strangely high on a feeling of being wanted in a way, that he has never been before. He feels ravished. The officer's kisses are a hungry onslaught and he pulls of Aaron shirt skillfully as he carresses his battered body with rough hands. It’s empowering and dangerous and wildly exciting and when the officer slips his hand down his pants and starts rubbing his cock, he willlingly succumbs to the pleasure.

“What’s your first name?” Aaron whispers after he's come and is trying to catch his breath.

“Why?” 

“Just wanna know who I'm fucking”

“Robert, but never you mind. We’ll be embarking in New York tomorrow afternoon”


	3. Arriving

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Third chapter. Aaron's pow. Next chapter will change to Robert's.

A heavy hand on his shoulder wakes him. When he turns around, he has to search his sleepy mind for the name going with the now fully dressed man, sitting in front of him.

“We’ll be in New York tonight”

He’s got a love bite on his neck, Aaron notices.

“…I thought you might want to know”

Aaron nods and tries to pull the blanket around his body. He’s cold.

“Right” he yawns.

Then to his surprise, the officer bows down and kisses him. It’s a long lingering kiss and Aaron’s treacherous naked body instinctively lifts itself to hang on for more. He finally remembers the name. Robert! Then the officer gets up and leaves, the door shutting behind him. Bang!

That was obviously goodbye then? Aaron shakes his head in disbelief. He still doesn’t understand what's happend since the shipwreck. Well he does, survival instinct and carnal lust, but it really isn't excusable. He sighs deeply and then out of the corner of his eye, he suddenly notices a wad of money on the mattress. His temper rises immediately and he flies up to pursue the arrogant sod, but then it hits him. They are embarking in New York later today! 

The realization spurs him into panicked action and he gets dressed. He needs to get back to finding Ed. On the way out, he glances at the wad of money for a long moment. Then he throws decency to the wind and puts it in his pocket. He and Ed will need it! He suppresses the smell of another man on his body and leaves the cabin, determined to speak to the captain and forget all about the last two nights.

But the captain’s busy and the day passes with several unsuccessful attempts to get to speak to him. After the third attempt, Aaron loses his determination. He can’t shake off a nagging feeling of guilt. How could he spend not just one, but two nights with a strange man? The self-loathing, he knows so well, creeps into his system and he falls into apathy, staring out over the sea. Liv tries to cheer him up several times, by making fun of the rich passengers, but he doesn’t even manage to pull off a fake smile and he feels nothing when late in the evening, the impressive skyline of New York finally appears in the horizon. 

“What’s going to happen to me Aaron?”

It takes a childlike and vulnerable Liv to bring him back to the present. Gone is the cheeky brashness. She looks lost. He grabs her hand reassuringly and they stand on the deck in silence, side by side, until the ship boards. The minute the ships hits quay that changes however. The third class survivors are gathered by the crew and told they have to go through immigration. One feisty woman complains loudly, as they watch the second and first class survivors leaving without being checked. Among those are members of the Titanic crew and Aaron can’t help look after Robert and for a second, he thinks he recognizes his tall figure among the men leaving.

Then without notice, the third class passengers, are ushered under deck and called in to the captain’s office one by one. When it’s Aaron’s turn to enter the elaborately decorated cabin, a cold sweat breaks out on his brow. He needs to ask for Ed, but he never was any good with authorities. He recognizes the captain and is introduced to a small pale man representing White Star Line. He answers all the questions from the stern looking American immigration officer in monosyllables and then finally, when they all seem content, he throws caution to the wind and asks the question, that’s been on his mind all day.

“Sorry, but do you know, where I can find the rest of the passengers from the Titanic?”

For a very long minute, you can hear a needle drop to the floor.

“What do you mean Mr. Dingle?"

The pale looking representative from the White Star Line looks at him with emphathy and choses his next words carefully.

“It's been three days since she went down…and I’m afraid there aren’t any other survivors...than the ones aboard this ship”

Aaron doesn’t quite comprehend.

“But…but…my friend Ed Roberts, he’s missing…and I…” His voice breaks and it takes all his willpower to continue as the representative’s words sinks in. “I’m a horse man and I have some experience with mechanical automobiles, so if you know of anywhere I can work while...I wait for him…then”

Bang. Suddenly the door crashes open and Liv storms in to the cabin and throws her arms around him. She’s followed by a frumpy looking woman, completely out of breath.

“Aaron. This bitch wants to take me to an orphanage…” She shrieks.

The frumpy woman frowns and puts her arms in her sides.

“An orphanage Aaron. Hello”

Liv looks at him desperately.

“Aaron HELP ME”.

Tears starts flowing from her eyes.

“Please let us stay together. Please!”

Then for some reason Aaron breaks out of his haze and slowly nods

“She’s my sister” He says in a toneless voice.

His statement is followed by the rustling of papers, whispering and writing going on before the representative starts speaking. Liv looks like she's holding her breath and Aaron doesn't really listen. It's something about no documentation, having to take their words for granted, expenses the shipping company will cover and then finally names of relatives to contact. Oh God, Aaron had forgotten about his mum and Adam! They need to know he’s safe and Ed’s family? His heart crumbles. No, it can’t be true! It just can't and then out of nowhere, he starts crying.

“Aaron?”

Liv suddenly looks really scared, but before he can reasure her, they are both quickly ushered out of the cabin and then he’s standing on the quay in an unknown city, not knowing where to go, with the responsibility of a young girl and a broken heart. He gets caught in the hustle and bustle on the busy quay and suddenly somebody takes a picture of him and Liv. The blinding flash cuts through his brain and it feels like it’s splitting into a million pieces and then, to his relief, he falls into deep darkness.

When he wakes up, he finds himself in a hospital bed behind a screen, surrounded by mumbling voices. He hears words through water and his vision is blurred. He recognizes Liv sitting next to him, holding his hand and then he notices the representative from White Star Line.

“Mr. Dingle. Mr. Dingle" He says. "Oh thank God. You had us worried there. Three days you’ve been gone to world. You have severe skull fracture and are in no state to take care of your sister, but luckily some kind people have volunteered to take her in. Do you understand? And the kind people have offered to house you too"

He points to a finely dressed young brunette and speaks to Aaron as if he's deaf, forming every word clearly and Aaron tries to understand, but he’s really too tired and then Liv breaks in and introduces the young woman and his mind starts boiling.

“This is Victoria. I’m staying at her home. Everybody is ever so nice? They read about us in the newspaper and you being sick and all, they decided to help us and…”

“Thank you Olivia” The young woman smiles and puts a firm hand on Liv’s shoulder. 

“…but she’s right. You must come stay with us Mr. Dingle tomorrow. We insist and Liv misses you. Everything is taken care of. I have spoken to the doctor and your family has been telegraphed, but we haven’t been able to contact Liv’s father, so if you could help us on that…”

He sees the panic in Liv's eyes and manages to avoid to answer the woman by feigning sudden fatigue. But the next day when he's driven in a carriage through the city, his tired mind keeps running in circles around how to tell Liv of her mother's fate and what to write to Ed’s parents and how he's going to ask Chas to support this new relationship to Liv. So he’s absolutely exhausted by the time the carriage stops in front of a fancy house in a wealthy district and he’s met by Liv and Victoria and a group of servants. He willingly succumbs to their help and let them lead him through the servant’s entrance, downstairs and into a small room, where he's put to bed to finally escape into sleep.

After a couple of days recovering in relative solitude, he starts taking his meals in the kitchen with the servants and he manages to write a letter to Chas with Liv doing the spelling, that explains the situation and to get Liv to tell Victoria that her father has been told of her survival and even to tell Liv, that there isn’t much hope for Ed and Sandra.

“Please don’t leave me” is all she says as she stares out the window. "Please. Whatever happens! Promise me"

He does and strangely that promise gives him a sense of purpose and after a week of doing nothing, he decides to ask the head servant for something to do, telling him about his previous experience with horses and automobiles.

“I’ll see how I can help, but before I do, you need to meet the family. They have been asking about you”

So an hour later he follows Liv upstairs. Oddly she doesn’t seem too happy about it, but he puts it down to the same apprehensive feeling, he has of being low class, when he walks up the posh stairscase under the chandelier, behind the butler.

“Oh how wonderful to see you on your feet" Victoria smiles warmly when they enter the drawing room in dark oak. "This is my sister-in-law Christine and her sister, Rebekka. Christine is married to my brother, who’s an officer on the Titanic. Well was. He's another survivor. We're all originally from around Emmerdale, so when we read about you in the paper, we just had to help, isn’t that right?” 

“What?” Aaron looks confused at her.

“Didn't Liv tell you?”

He looks at Liv, who sends him an innocent smile. He frowns. What's going on?

“Oh there he is” Victoria then shrieks and Aaron follows her gaze and turns round to be met by a casually dressed Robert, hands in pockets sporting an smug smile and calculating green eyes.


	4. Temptation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The next three chapters are Robert's pov. This first one centers on how his "cosy but complicated" life as a social climber in New York, suddenly comes under threat.

He’s half naked getting ready for bed, angrily pulling off his shirt, seething inside. What the hell is that low class rent boy playing at? He almost had the shock of his life seeing him and the girl in the drawing room. Absorbed in his own thoughts he flinches when hands snake around his body. He feels like shrugging them off violently.

“Sorry” Chrissie whispers and holds him firm. He can feel her corseted body against his back. “I should have told you”

“You should” he miffs.

“I’ll tell them to leave”

“No” He says way too fast. “How’s that going to look? They’re Titanic survivors for Christ sake”

She sighs and kisses him on the neck.

“So are you and you’re still bruised on your neck”

Shit, he instinctively covers the remains of the hickey with his hand, but she doesn’t seem to notice. Her hands are busy sliding down his trousers.

“My poor baby” She whispers and moves them further down. “I just didn’t think you would mind us sheltering two shipwrecked siblings…but you really did look like you had seen a ghost…”

His mind is immediately thrown back into turmoil. Siblings? What the fuck is Aaron up to? Nothing can ruin his position in the White household. Nothing! He’s worked so hard for it. However Aaron’s not going to say anything, is he? What they did was illegal after all. So all he has to do, is to make sure that Chrissie doesn’t start to suspect something?

To prove this point, he turns around, kisses her passionately and pushes her backwards to the four poster bed in the middle of the room. She gives a surprised laugh and willingly slips out of her corset and petticoat and surrenders to his aggressive lovemaking, moaning and clawing like a cat in heat while he, even after release, is still strangely unsettled.

 

Even after a night’s sleep, he continues to feel restless and spends the next morning aimlessly walking around the house in his dressing gown contemplating how to warn off Aaron. He’s on temporary leave from the White Star Line and everybody is walking on eggshells around him except Chrissie, who’s constantly fussing over him. He’s not sure what’s worse.

At noon there’s a hand delivered letter ordering him to give testimony at the Titanic inquest in Washington in a week. He must somehow appear shocked and maybe he is, because Chrissie feels obliged to comfort him, stroking his hair and kissing him again and again. He’s just about to explode, when suddenly the frustration of it all, gives him an idea. Maybe all this unwanted empathy from everybody could be used to finally get him into the White’s family company? He’s tried to convince Chrissie to talk to Lawrence a million times, but it always ends in tears and her accusing him of beeing a gold digger, but she can hardly do that now, can she? 

“The keys for the Rooster please” he says to the two pairs of dirty overalls under the boot of the families old Ford in the garage.

He's decided to escape Chrissie's suffocating love and go for a drive and just leaving the house has already made him feel better. Now he can't wait to take his brand new Rooster for a spin and put some more thought into the plan shaping in his mind. It's great to be back doing what he does best and he's sure he's back on track.

“I said the keys for the Rooster please?” He repeats.

The boot’s finally pushed down and it throws him right back into a turmoil of emotions. In front of him are Ross, the family chauffeur, and a morose looking Aaron, smudged in oil.

“Right sir, coming up”

For a minute he’s left alone with Aaron and all thoughts of an angry warning miraculously evaporates and is replaced by a strange feeling of tenderness, he recalls from the morning he left him on the Carpathia and leaves him lost for words. It lasts until the girl, Olivia, turns up with an expression of guilt, written all over her face.

"Well if it isn’t the siblings?” He finally manages to cough.

“Please don’t tell them, please” Liv immediately puts on her little girl act. He’s seen her do it on the Carparthia more than once. “Honestly. We didn’t know this was your house”

He raises an eyebrow “Really”

“Well Aaron didn’t and I needed a place to stay. He almost died you know? And they wanted to put me in an orphanage…and then your sister came and she was ever so nice and…and then she invited Aaron to stay too. His mum’s on her way and as soon as she’s here and Aaron’s given evidence, we’ll leave. It’s a promise, isn’t it Aaron?”

Robert looks at Aaron. Close up he’s eyes are bloodshot and he’s pale under the stains of black oil and Robert is overwhelmed by an urge to comfort him, but instead he manages to revert to being Robert. 

“Just you remember, you’re staying in my house. Oh and besides, I wouldn't mind having my money back at some point, since you are now on my payroll or is that just the matter of future payment, out of the world?”

It’s said with a smug smile and it makes Aaron's tired eyes flare with anger and Robert’s heart skip a beat, but then Thank God Ross returns with the car keys. Christ what's happening to him? He can't make this weakness mess up his life. He really can't! He needs to concetrate on planning his future.

 

At breakfast the next morning Chrissie is all loved up again, feeding him bits of toast, while Rebecca’s seems as clueless as ever and Lawrence presides at the end of the table behind The New York Times. It’s claustrophobic, but in a strange way it helps him to act depressed, which is the strategy, he chose yesterday and so far everything is going according to plan. That’s until Vic starts talking about Aaron helping Ross in the garage and Robert makes a silly mistake.

“Is he a driver?” Robert can’t help asking curiously falling out of character as he suddenly realizes he knows almost nothing about Aaron.

“I don’t think so” Vic smiles obviously thrilled his taking an interest. “He seems very nice though, sad of course, but glad to have something to do despite his injury. Good with his hands, Ross says”

Well Robert can confirm that, but for some reason, he wants to know more. It’s really just a as precaution, he tells himself, forgetting to be depressed, leaning closer to Vic.

“What happened to him?”

“He had some kind of a skull fracture, but he’s a lot better now. The girl lost her mum and they’ve also lost their travelling companion. They were apparently all very close”

Travelling companion, my ass, Robert thinks while nodding emphatetically. 

“I am bit worried about the girl, though” Vic continues with a speculative look “It can be good for her to be idle after all she’s gone through. I could teach her, you know! I mean their family is on the way from Emmerdale, so it would only be for a few days or weeks, but it would keep her occupied”

“It’s so nice to see you taking an interest in the poor things” Chrissie smiles and kisses his hand. “Maybe you would like to go shopping with me later?”

After a moment of complete silence, Robert is unexpectedly saved by Lawrence of all people.

“Oh for God sake, Chrissie!” He exclaims, looking over his paper. “If the poor man isn’t ill already, a trip to Macy’s will sure do the job. Leave him alone woman”

“I'm sorry, but I can’t face it darling”

Robert quickly reverts to character. Then he gets up and out of the corner of his eyes, he notices all the worried glances following him, as he rushes out of the room.

 

Later in the day he decides to go to the garage. He’s sure he heard a noise in the Rooster’s engine yesterday and it needs to be dealt with whether Aaron is there or not. It would be suspicious if he didn’t, wouldn't it? After all, the Rooster is his pride and joy. To avoid female probing though, he carefully chooses to walk through the garden behind the house following a small inconspicuous path.

It’s a chilly day, but spring’s in the air with yellow and lilac flower’s peeping through the dark earth. Suddenly he feels grateful to be alive as he reaches the door to the garage. It’s half open and there’s sound of splashing water. He feels oddly shy and chooses to take a peep before going in, telling himself to remember to act normal. But the sight that meets him throws him into anything but.

Aaron’s washing his Rooster in wet overalls, clinging to his pert ass and in that moment Robert realizes that he must have him again. He’s something different after all. Robert knew that when he first noticed him among the third class passengers on the deck of the Titanic and later when he found him floating around the icy Sea more dead than alive and later again when they shared a cabin. It’s happened before this craving for another male, but not for more than one night, but this is very different and both deeply unsettling and strangely exciting. 

His heart starts beating faster, adrenaline runs through his veins and there’s a stirring in his cock, when he's saved by Liv and Ross suddenly appearing from the front side of the garage with sandwiches and soft drinks in their hands. It's obviously time for lunch and the intrusion makes Robert come to his senses. He retreats back through the garden, to the safety of the drawing room of the house. Christ, what was he just about to do? One thing is one night stands in exotic ports, but under his own roof and under the pretence of an engine problem. He must have gone completely mad.

He's almost back to breathing normally, when someone enters the room. To his relief it’s just Rebecca wearing a colorful dress and a funny looking hat, but his relief is short lived.

“I miss you” she smiles with a hopeful look in her eyes after scanning the room to see if they’re alone.

“Oh no, please don’t start Becca” He says.

"But I have to" She answers. "I know you’re not feeling good, but we love each other, remember? And I’ve been thinking. I know you’ve had a horrible experience and you’re depressed, but I can make you feel better. So why don't we run off together!"

He's left completely spechless. Bloody hell where did that come from? He hasn't heard anything more stupid in a long time. What a day he's having.

“Rebecca please! We’ve been through this before. I have to think about Chrissie and what about Lawrence. It will kill him.”

He shakes his head in disbelief.

“You didn’t think about her last month, though, did you”

“Becca please. It was a mistake. We agreed on that”

"No you agreed"

For a moment she looks terribly hurt, but then there’s suddenly a fire in her eyes.

“Ross doesn’t think I’m unattractive, you know”

“Who?”

“The chauffeur”

He's gobsmacked and doesn't know what else to do, but to fall down on one of the Chesterfield chairs in despair, burying his head in his hands. Between his fingers, he can see her suddenly go pale.

“Oh no Robert I’m sorry…but you can’t treat me like this”

“I just went through hell, Becca, please this is not the right time"

He must make a convincing job of sounding exhausted, because she starts crying, so he lets her comfort him for a while, before he sneaks off pretending to need a lie down. Safe on his bed, he curses himself for taking advantage of her to spite Chrissie. After all Becca had been in love with him since they were introduced at an officer’s ball at the British Consulate and if it hadn’t been for Lawrence, who quickly made it clear, that Robert would never benefit from marrying his younger daughter, it could have been him and Becca. But Robert had to change horses and Chrissie needed a husband after her disaster of a first marriage, so Lawrence accepted that liason, but Rebecca was crushed. That is until last month. He tries to close his eyes for a second, but is met by an image of a drenched Aaron and sighs. Talk about having a fucked up life.


	5. Manipulation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Robert's pow as the inner conflict between his ambitions and his feelings grow.

Any hope of Rebecca forgetting her illusional fantasy of running away with him, perishes the next morning when she makes a spectacle of herself at breakfast.

“Is it ok if I have Ross today?” she smiles smugly “I have a few errands around town” When nobody responds she continues with a casual invitation. “You want to come, Rob?”

He’s in another world after a restless night filled with wet dreams of a drenched Aaron, kicking  Chrissie in his sleep. Chrissie on the other hand looks up from her toast and sends her sister a penetrating stare.

“No Becca. He doesn’t. He’s going riding with me”

“You can stop that right away, ladies” Lawrence interrupts. “I’m afraid Robert has no time for leisure activities today, right Robert?”

“Sorry?” Robert looks up from his tea fighting away an image of Aaron’s ass.

“Should we say in half an hour in my study?”

“Yeah, sure” The images of Aaron shatters and a confused Robert realizes he has to get a grip on himself before this sordid distraction jeopardizes his whole life.

 

Half an hour later, Lawrence offers him a cigar and a glass of brandy in his study. Robert declines the cigar but accepts the drink. It's only the second time Lawrence has ever invited him for a private talk and he can't help being somewhat excited. So right there and then, he decides to forget about Aaron. After all, the world is full of available men, isn't it? 

“I am asking of you to trust me” Lawrence begins slowly clearing his voce, before he lowers it to a whisper“…and confide the details of the shipwreck to me... I promise, it will go no further than these walls”

Robert looks at him with surprise. What?

“I know it’s a delicate matter and you would be doing me a great favor” Lawrence continues “… but apparently a lawsuit might be on the way and I have invested a large sum in the White Star Line”

Robert stares at him in a moment of bewilderment and takes a big sip of the brandy to win time, but as the liquor burns its way down his throat, he has already forgotten all about any loyalty towards his employer. This is the opportunity he’s been looking for. So he nods, takes a deep breath and begins telling Lawrence about the horrors of the shipwreck. He stops a few times to make it more convincing and by the end of the story, he blurts out his present worries in what he hopes is a deeply emotional way.

“I’m going to be under oath at the inquest in a few days and I will have to talk about the mayhem caused by the lack of lifeboats and security procedures and then... where will I be?”

He runs his hands despairingly down his face. For several long minutes silence fills the study. Then Lawrence speaks.

“Would you by any chance be interested in a job in my business?”

For a moment Robert’s left speechless. “What?” He has to take a deep breath before he continues. “But…but Chrissie. She doesn’t want me to work for you...”

“Leave it to me to explain it to her” Lawrence interrupts. "That's a deal then"

A triumphant feeling swirls through Robert and without thinking, he falls out of character and back to his old self and on the way out he turns towards Lawrence.

“I’m sorry, but I need to tell you something. I don’t know how to say this, but I saw Rebecca and the chauffeur, Ross, gallivanting around the garage earlier today”

Lawrence instantly turns hostile and Robert hurries out without another word, regretting his brashness. Did he go too far?

 

Apparantly not! For by some miracle everything plays into his hands that evening. Well almost everything. Around 11 pm, he hears Rebecca stumbling up the stairway, arriving home from some social event.

“Bye, bye Ross” she shouts between fits of giggles.

Then there's suddenly a loud bang followed by silence. Chrissie wakes up beside him and they both get up to see what’s going on. The headservant and a very angry Lawrence is already on the stairway, looking down at a disheveled Rebecca smelling of alcohol and laughing her head off lying on her back.

"Robert" She whispers drunkenly. "Ross and I had a wonderful evening"

“Oh for God’s sake” Chrissies exclaims. “Have you no shame?”

Before Rebecca can answer, she grabs her by her hair and pulls her into Lawrence’s study, where the door is slammed in the face of Robert.

"You stay out" Chrissie shouts at him.

He quickly retires to the bedroom. Rebecca’s behavior is perfect. The more promiscuous she's seen to be, the better for him, but God does he hate to be left out and God does he hate it when Chrissie is angry with him. He can't stand not knowing anything, so he opens the door to the bedroom and eavesdrop on the fight taking place in the study. It ends when Rebecca suddenly storms out in a flood of tears. Soon after the drama continues when a tipsy looking Ross skips up the stairs. Another fight takes place and Ross soon leaves with an expression of anger written all over his face. So Lawrence did listen to him after all. Robert smiles and goes back to bed. Job well done. But he hasn't even closed his eyes before the headservant knocks on the bedroom door and asks him to follow him to Mr. Whites study. Robert does as he's told and that's when things turn astray. Because suddenly he's confronted with a sleepy Aaron in the study and he doesn't really hear what Lawrence says at first out of sheer chok.

“…fired Ross...until...new driver...Aaron here has agreed to take on that role, but even though he has driven a car before he needs to be instructed in the traffic. Chrissie and I have come up with the idea that you can do that Robert. After all you want to work for the family? Right, Chrissie?”

Chrissie smiles coldly and Lawrence looks sternly at Robert. Oh no, has he told her about the job?

“But…” Robert’s hearts starts beating fast. 

“No but…” Lawrence says firmly “Tomorrow morning at 10 o’clock you will take Aaron for a drive and teach him his way about New York. It shouldn’t take more than a day”

 

He feels oddly stressed out and hardly sleeps all night between worrying about Chrissie, who is very cold towards him when she finally comes to bed, and his own panic at the thought of spending a whole day with Aaron, but in the early hours of the morning, he convinces himself he can sweettalk Chrissie and keep the eye on the ball. He has to. So the next morning he is full of decisive energy when he enters the garage.

Aaron's already in the car. His hands clenched around the steering wheel sporting a slight cut close to his mouth. For some reason it makes Robert's heart flutter like mad and he has to muster all his willpower even before they’ve started. He manages to nod though and Aaron starts the car and drives out of the garage. He’s a natural driver. Relaxed and calm, but he has no experience of city traffic and several times, Robert has to shout out and adjust the steering wheel to avoid disasters. 

“No stop. I need to tell you some of the rules” He says after a short while. "This is hazardous"

Aaron stops the car at the roadside immidiately and Robert slowly explains the basic traffic rules to him. It breaks the ice and when they start driving again, he can’t help asking a more personal question just for his own peace of mind.

“When are you leaving?” He doesn't look at Aaron.

Aaron keeps the eyes on the road, throwing him a short glance.

“I’ve been summoned to go to the Titanic inquest in Washington next week. After that I suppose...”

There’s a long silence, then all of a sudden Aaron says something which has obviously been on his mind.

“You know what I think is funny? You being ordered by Mr. White to teach me the ins and outs of New York’s traffic”

“Is that so” Robert smiles. For some reason he finds feisty Aaron cute.

“Yeah, cause it seems to me you’re just the payed for young husband and we’re not so different after all”

It's obviously supposed to sting, but Aaron is no match for Robert when it comes to playing games.

“Well the more reason for you to pay me my money back then” Robert answers smugly and sends him a flirty smile. “and seeing that I'm also going to the inquest next week, why don't you drive me there and work it off?”

Aaron turns and looks at him with horror and almost hits another car.

 

Back in the garage Aaron angrily pulls the keys out of the ignition. He’s been gloomy during the last hour. Robert on the other hand, has, inspite of all his intentions, been enjoying the tension. It's made him feel strangely alive and he's sad to see it come to an end. 

"All right. I’ll go with you” Aaron turns towards him and puts the keys in his hand. “If it's ok with Mr. White that is, but then we’re done”

"Aaron" Robert wants to tell him to relax, but Aaron's already on his way out of the car.

"Aaron" he tries again, but Aaron not listening.

So as a last resort Robert pulls him back in, turns him around and grabs his face with both his hands and kisses him. After a few seconds, the kiss is hesitantly responded and he feels himself going hard as his frantic hands search for ways to open Aaron’s jacket and shirt and he’s just about to succeed,  when Aaron suddenly jumps away like he’s been stung by a wasp. Then Robert notices loud voices and next thing, the car door is being pulled open by a middle aged brunette and a young man screaming with delight.

“Mum” Aaron exclaims “Adam” and then suddenly Aaron bursts into tears.

After a moment of chok, Robert realizes that they've not been busted for sodomy, but that he's in the middle of a family reunion, where nobody has even noticed him. So a relieved Robert sheepishly steps out the car and sneaks off. Before he closes the garage door behind him however, he glances back and sees Aaron surrounded by his family and then Aaron does something that hits Robert with a unexpected pang of excitement. He smiles at him!


End file.
